Want to achieve success in your career, have healthy relationships, build a profitable business, and live to your fullest potential?
Build your self-esteem.
What is Self-Esteem?
It is the measure to which a person values themselves, the worth and respect they accord themselves, and the beliefs they hold about themselves. According to self-esteem expert Morris Rosenberg, self-esteem is “favorable or unfavorable attitude toward the self.”
How one sees themselves affects how they expect others to perceive them and ultimately impact their behavior and performance.
Just as too little of it holds you back, an extreme case of high self-esteem is not the way to go either. Self-esteem that is too much is a situation where an individual holds an unrealistic perception about themselves. It leads to an inability to work with others and learn from failures.
You need to strike a balance – have a positive and realistic perception of yourself.
What Causes Low Self-Esteem?
Many people are not living their best lives due to poor self-esteem which hinders them from attaining self -confidence. Here are the effects low self-esteem.
Trying Too Hard to Please
People suffering from low self-esteem are always seeking validation from others. For this reason, they hardly say no. They put the needs of others before their own and set no boundaries, thereby earn more self-esteem.
The concept of cognitive dissonance states that human beings like to be consistent. They want their actions to be in sync with their beliefs and values. When this doesn’t happen, they do what it takes to line them up again such as self-sabotaging behavior.
Inability to Connect at a Deeper Level
People with low self-esteem, are ashamed of who they are. They hide their true self from others, scared that they will judge them as negatively as they judge themselves. Afraid of showing their vulnerability, they create distance with everyone leading to loneliness and eventually, depression.
Inability to Take Compliments or Constructive Criticism
People with low self-esteem miss on the opportunities for growth that come from constructive criticism. Instead, they see it as confirmation that they are failures. The fact that they seek validation from others means that they dwell on every little criticism thrown their way.
On the other hand, they doubt every genuine compliment they receive. When you don’t think highly of yourself, you expect the same from others.
Life is full of challenges, and one tool to overcoming these challenges is positivity. It’s a trait that people with low self-esteem lack. They believe that they deserve the bad things that happen to them. They feel hopeless that things can ever get better. They hardly fight back or strive to improve on themselves.
Lack of Self-care
When your sense of self-worth is low, you see no point in taking care of yourself, physically or emotionally. People lacking in self-esteem are likely to engage in destructive behaviors such as compulsive sex, poor hygiene, and poor nutrition. They neglect their health because … “what’s the point?”
15 Resources to Help You Build Self-Esteem
Developing your self-esteem requires you to change your pattern of thinking, and attitude towards yourself. You can choose to DIY or you could use the help of experts to guide you to build confidence and self-esteem. The following resources are from the best in the field of self-esteem. They contain techniques and tools that can help you alter negative effects and live a better more fulfilled life.
A registered mental health charity, Mind empowers individuals facing mental health problems by providing support and advice. The organization gives valuable tips to improve your self-esteem.
There is a load of information on any other life issues you may be facing that could be the root cause of your low self-esteem.
The best part about Mind is that it contains success stories and videos of people who have been through intense phases of low self-esteem. They faced issues such as anxiety but worked their way out of them.
This site is a must-use for anyone committed to taking a turn around in their life.
NASE focuses on building awareness on the value of self-esteem and integrating it into society.
They want everyone experience a healthy sense of self-esteem and. contentment, irrespective of age and background.
The self-guided tour into rating your self-esteem is an excellent tool to explore your inner thoughts and open your eyes to how you think about yourself.
On this site, there are numerous resources and tools to help you build your self-esteem. In addition, there is invaluable advice from experts in the field and lesson plans offering a step by step guide to strengthening your self-esteem.
Getting serious with the guidelines from NASE is similar to having worked with a self-esteem therapist.
3) Mental Help
Mental Help operates under the American Addiction Centers, Inc. (AAC). It treats individuals suffering from addiction and co-occurring conditions such as bipolar disorder, anxiety, and depression.
The organization covers a variety of topics on disorders and life issues most of which have a direct effect on self-esteem such as rape, domestic violence, and disabilities.
The resources available to help develop your self-esteem include a question and answer forum where there is advice to people facing day to day issues that you can relate to.
There is an in-depth analysis of self-esteem and a practical guide to improving your own and that of your children.
This website has various tips and techniques to build on your self-esteem as well as resources and tools for personal development and self-improvement.
As its name suggest, this is a school designed to teach you a new way of thinking and reasoning that can help you improve on your self-confidence and self-value.
The materials available to help you overcome the barriers and obstacles holding you back include articles, worksheets, exercises, tests, activities, questionnaires, quotes, and affirmations, all on self-esteem.
Available, also, is a free copy of a self-esteem workbook which contains eight valuable and practical lessons to developing your self-value.
5) IQ Matrix
Adam Sicinski, the founder of IQ Matrix and a qualified life coach, uses the technique of categorizing the most important and practical ideas about a topic into easy to follow tips. He uses mind maps and visual thinking principles to guide people into self-coaching.
As an 8-part series to help individuals develop more confidence in the pursuit of their goals, Sicinski has created a guide on self-esteem.
The guide looks at the evolution of your low self-esteem from its possible point of inception, the habits that reinforce it, and a solution to undoing the entire mess to build a more confident you who is capable of living a successful life.
IQ Matrix uses a unique approach to developing self-esteem and self-confidence that is worth trying.
The organization provides advocacy, networking, and useful resources to individuals living with disabilities and their families in the community.
Disability is a major factor that affects one’s self-esteem. Having to depend on others for basic day to day needs can be a blow to your sense of self-worth.
MTSTCIL has put together a simple but effective class to develop positive self-image and self-esteem. Included, is a test on self-image and a practical guide to building your confidence.
A major lesson to learn from the site is having control over the inner critic. An inner critic is a constant and nagging reminder of your weaknesses and inadequacies. It judges your every move, tells you are not good enough and undermines your accomplishments. It kills your self-confidence and sense of self-worth, making you believe you cannot amount to something in life.
By the end of the lessons you will have power over your inner critic and, your perception of yourself is sure to change to a positive self-image.
Dr. Marilyn Sorensen is an expert in self-esteem who has in-depth understanding of its forms, its effects on an individual’s life. She is known to develop strategies to build your self-esteem and live a life of confidence.
She has valuable resources on developing self-esteem such as a Low Self-Esteem Recovery Program known as F T H therapy. The recovery program comes at a small fee of $16.95 which is worth it, and is available in the Self-esteem Institute website.
There are lots of workbooks written by the expert which address overcoming your low self-confidence. It also equips your children with tips to develop healthy self-esteem and build their confidence.
No amount of money can compare to the transformation and life success that result from the recovery program and her self-help books.
This is a self-help guide put together by the Dumfries and Galloway Department of Psychological Services and Research.
The guide helps you understand the root cause of your poor self-esteem. It also provides a practical guide to changing your self-beliefs and strengthening your self-confidence in different areas of your life.
The fact that specialists in the field prepared it is a guarantee that the tips and methods are in line with how the mind works and hence very effective.
Zero to Three tries to resolve some of the self-esteem issues that result from poor childhood experiences using the best method: prevention.
Self-esteem in an individual is highly dependent on how well their confidence was nurtured in their childhood. As a parent, you have a role in equipping your child with the self-confidence necessary to make them successful.
Zero to Three gives valuable advice on topics such as positive parenting approaches that bring out a child with healthy self-esteem.
It gives valuable advice on helping your child in times of trauma to prevent it from leaving a life-long scar on their personality. It also guides parents into understanding the importance of infant mental health which influences the development of healthy social and emotional behaviors.
The topics on this site are a must-read for every parent who desires to bring up a child with healthy self-confidence and self-esteem.
Catherine Pratt founded this website. Having lived through a phase in life where she felt inadequate, she helps people develop their confidence and self-esteem using techniques that have worked in her life.
Catherine is knowledgeable and passionate about helping people live their best lives. She has written numerous books and articles on self-esteem and developing confidence.
She has incorporated games themed on confidence into the site such as word scramble, word searches, crossword puzzles, and picture puzzles which makes your journey to increased self-esteem fun. Included also is humor, poems, and quotes that are bound to catch your interest.
Life with Confidence is an excellent resource to build your self-esteem coming from a person who has been through what you are experiencing.
11) Mark Tyrrell
Mark Tyrell is a qualified psychotherapist and hypnotherapist. He is the creator of the self-help website UncommonHelp.me co-founder of HypnosisDownloads.com and several top psychology websites.
Mark Tyrell has also created 10 Steps to Solid Self Esteem Hypnosis Course which you can get at $147.00. The audio comes with a 155-page workbook and is worth every penny.
What’s best is that if the hypnosis doesn’t work, you can contact them within 90 days and get a full refund.
Hypnosis is a technique which involves focused attention, minimized awareness of the surrounding, and an amplified ability to respond to suggestion.
Mark Tyrell uses the technique to achieve a more profound, unconscious level of change in the listener and create new, more helpful patterns of thoughts and behavior.
12) More Self-Esteem
Run by Karl Perera, More Self-esteem is based on years of personal experience. You can be sure that the tips and methods have worked and will work with you.
The site focuses on providing self-help material in the form of articles, tests, tips, courses, and product recommendations to help you build unshakeable self-esteem and self-confidence.
It tackles self-consciousness which is a significant factor in developing self-confidence and also teaches on developing social-confidence.
Poor self-esteem results in depression, which is a major cause of suicide. Perera, through his site gives you the power to take over your life and thoughts. The site is a helpful resource with practical advice to help you fight depression.
For every situation you are going through, someone out there has been through a similar predicament. In their own words, the Possibility of Change is a site of “real people, real stories, real change.”
With a community of over 50,000 people, the Possibility of Change is a mine of inspirational stories and practical advice to help you bring change to your life.
Once you have worked on your issues, you can join the community and help others facing similar self-esteem issues. By so doing, the low rate of self-esteem in the world, which stands at 85% according to research by Dr. Joe Rubino, can hopefully drop.
Self-Confidence.co.uk is a self-help site under Uncommon Knowledge which is a team of therapists, psychologists, and trainers specializing in confidence.
Build your self-confidence and self-esteem with their confidence building email course and numerous helpful articles and tips.
They have helped people with self-esteem and self-confidence issues since 2001. With over a quarter of a million people benefiting from the course, it’s sure to change your life too.
15) Steven Aitchison
In a day, so many things happen that slowly kill your self-esteem. From negative comments in a selfie you post on Instagram, to a malicious comment from your boss, it’s a mean world, and you have to fight all the negativity.
This website by Steven Aitchison is designed to help you work on various areas of your life resulting in an indestructible sense of self-worth.
It contains excellent tips in the areas of personal development such as handling pain, trauma, and crisis which if mishandled can crush your confidence.
Its purpose is to change your thoughts and as a result, change your life.
Belief in your value as a human being and in your ability to be productive is a decisive factor in life. Most people lack it and end up surviving instead of living.
Some of the factors that contributed to your poor self-esteem may have been out of your control such as your family background and disability. Others may have been due to your own outlook on life for instance, letting your age affect you, allowing the media and societal expectations dictate your life, staying in toxic relationships, and giving power to your inner critic.
However, the damage is not reversible. You don’t have to live the rest of your life self-sabotaging, being a yes-person, drowning in loneliness, or incapable of handling life’s challenges.
The above fifteen resources place the power to change your life in your hands. If you develop the self-discipline necessary to follow the advice, tips, and exercises given, you can transform yourself into a confident individual who is physically, socially, and economically fit.