our thoughts have a significant influence on the quality of life you live. Are you the kind of person who focuses on the empty part of the glass or the full part?
If you are always criticizing yourself, and seeing the world from a negative perspective, then you are most likely to lead a life of stress, low self-confidence, anxiety, and poor health.
Negative thinking also affects your productivity at work and in life in general, in addition to destroying your relationships.
Some people have dug themselves so deep into negativity that they know no other way of thinking. However, nothing is irreversible, with these practices, you can change your thought process and as a result, change your life.
Practice Gratefulness
“Gratitude is a powerful catalyst for happiness. It’s the spark that lights a fire of joy in your soul.” – Amy Collette.
John Kralik is the author of 365 Thank Yous. At the age of 53, he had gone through a divorce, his firm was failing, he was drifting apart from his children, was living at a cheap apartment instead of his own home, million-dollar jury verdict that could have bailed him out was nullified, and his girlfriend had just broken up with him.
He got an inspiration to be grateful for what he had instead of what he lacked. Kralik decided to write 365 thank-you notes in the coming year, and his life took a positive turn. He experienced financial gain, true friendship, and inner peace among other positive changes.
Rather than sit in sorrow on what you do not have, learn to appreciate what you do have. Practice deep gratitude. By shifting your focus, it makes you develop a more positive attitude towards the world and life. It acts as a catalyst to change your thinking pattern from negativity to positivity.
Motivation Tip
Keep a gratitude journal. At the end of each day, instead of complaining about the traffic, or the nasty encounter you had with your boss, write about the good things that happened. It’s never that bad. Tell someone ‘thank you.’ There is always something you can be grateful for.
Cultivating a habit of gratefulness improves your optimism, happiness, and health.
Use Positive Affirmations
According to an article published in 2005 by the National Science Foundation, the brain produces between 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts daily 95% of which are repetitive and 80% are negative.
These negative thoughts are an indication of the views and beliefs people hold of themselves and their abilities. Such thoughts can be countered with positive affirmations.
It’s incredible how much people underestimate the power of affirmations. Numerous studies have indicated that positive affirmations give people a positive self-view and any threat to perceived self-competence is met with resistance.
Affirmations act as suggestions to the subconscious mind which then actualizes the desired results.
Affirmations can be negative or positive. When you are repeatedly thinking and saying to yourself, “I can’t do this” or “I am not good enough” you are literally blocking your path to a better life.
Motivation Tip
Learn to use strong positive affirmations on yourself such as “I am capable,” or “I will complete this project.” Most important, believe in what you are saying, and your thought patterns will motivate actions that lead to the manifestation of your affirmations.
Exercise
Besides making you healthier, stronger, and confident in your appearance, exercise can help you change your thoughts and the perceptions you have about yourself.
According to the results from the Penn State University researchers, the physically active participants were more excited and enthusiastic compared to their less physically active counterparts.
“You don’t have to be the fittest person who is exercising every day to receive the feel-good benefits of exercise” David Conroy, Professor of Kinesiology at Penn State University.
When you successfully follow a fitness routine, you increase your confidence in your ability to get things done. Exercising involves setting goals. Repeatedly achieving these goals increases your belief in yourself.
Motivation Tip
Physical activity causes your body to release endorphins a feel-good chemical that gives you the feelings of positivity and overcome negative thinking. It also takes your mind off any stressing issues you may have and hence prevents you from overthinking and making a mountain out of a molehill.
You don’t have to become a bodybuilder; simple aerobic exercises can work just fine.
Practice Self-compassion
“When you are compassionate with yourself, you trust in your soul, which you let guide your life. Your soul knows the geography of your destiny better than you do” – John O’Donohue.
Compassion means showing warmth and kindness towards the suffering of other people. It also means showing understanding when other people make mistakes. Self-compassion means giving yourself the same treatment you give others when you are faced with similar situations.
According to Dr. Kristin Neff, an expert on self-compassion, being compassionate to yourself decreases your likelihood of experiencing depression, anxiety, and stress. It makes you happier, more resilient, and optimistic about the future.
Soothing your pain triggers the release of oxytocin which causes feelings of trust, safety, calmness, and connectedness. It also increases your ability to feel warmth and compassion towards yourself.
Rather than criticize yourself and judge yourself mercilessly for making mistakes and failing, practice self-forgiveness.
No one is perfect, so don’t treat yourself like you should be perfect. Just as you would treat a friend who made a mistake by forgiving them and showing them understanding, do the same to yourself.
Motivation Tip
If you are facing hard moments, do not blame yourself or think of how you were born to suffer. No. Comfort yourself like you would comfort a friend. Treat yourself like you would a loved one and embrace your humanness.
Learn to Forgive and Let Go
“Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.” –Jonathan Huie.
In 1974, a 10-year-old Chris Carrier was abducted, stabbed repeatedly, and shot in the head with a shotgun. Surprisingly, he survived the ordeal. Years later, he came face to face with his attacker and forgave him.
Chris Carrier comforted the man who was in the final days of his life and had no one to look after him, few people can do this. The act brought closure to Chris and his attacker. Forgiveness is not easy, but it comes with physical, mental, and spiritual health.
Psychologists describe forgiveness as a conscious and deliberate decision to release negative feelings of resentment or vengeance toward someone who has caused you harm, even when they do not deserve your forgiveness.
In a study by Charlotte vanOyen Witvliet, Ph.D., a psychologist at Hope College, she had her subjects remember someone who had caused them pain. The psychologist checked their sweat gland activity, heart rate, blood pressure, and facial muscle tension as they thought of the hurtful experience.
Results showed physical arousal indicating that it was stressful for them. When Witvliet asked the subjects to picture emphasizing with and forgiving their offenders, the physical arousal dropped.
Forgiving and letting go, is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Holding on to anger turns you into a bitter and resentful person. It takes its toll on your physical and mental health and reduces your productivity and happiness.
Motivation Tip
One quick approach to forgiveness is to empathize with the person who hurt you. They probably had no other choice but to act as they did. Thoughts such as “I want to see them suffer” or “I will never forget the hurt they caused me”, are not the stuff that builds strong personalities.
There are Two Sides to a Coin
There are always two ways to look to every situation, the positive and the negative. For instance, if your house burned down, why don’t you focus on the fact that no one was in it. Be optimistic.
Optimism is a key player in stress management and general wellbeing. Change your outlook of life. It does not mean ignoring your problems but approaching them more productively and positively.
Be conscious of the thoughts that run through your mind and ensure they are positive. Positive thinking can increase your lifespan, reduce depression, reduce the risk of cardiovascular diseases, and make you better at coping with hardships.
Avoid worry and expecting the worst out of every situation. It only incapacitates you and robs you of the joy of living.
As part of Cornell University’s Legacy Project, author of 30 Lessons for Living and professor of human development at the University, Karl Pillemer asked hundreds of older people on what they regretted in life, the answer he got – “I wish I hadn’t spent so much of my life worrying.”
Motivation Tip
It’s never too late to stop worrying about every little thing, focusing on how bad it could turn out instead of the good that could happen. Various studies have indicated that 85% of things we worry about never happen.
“My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.” – Michel de Montaigne.
Get into the Right Environment
“Our environment, the world in which we live and work, is a mirror of our attitudes and expectations.” – Earl Nightingale.
The things surrounding you influence your thoughts. Results from a study by the San Francisco State University indicated that the outside environment affects your thoughts. “Our conscious thoughts seem protected from our surroundings, but we found that they are much more tightly linked to the external environment than we might realize and that we have less control of what we will think of next,” Ezequiel Morsella, associate professor of psychology and co-author of the study.
Motivation Tip
Learn to subtract the things that lead to useless and harmful thoughts from your life, and this includes the company you keep. The negative people you interact with influence negative thoughts in you. The gossip on social media fills your mind with useless information.
Limit your interaction with the people you cannot eliminate from your life. Hang around people who inspire and challenge you. Interact with people who are positive-minded and think of progress.
Replace the fashion magazines that remind you of how slim you should be with books that inspire you to be a better person.
Concluding Thoughts
If you want to bring positive changes to your life, changing your thoughts is of paramount importance. To start with, learn to appreciate what you have. Start your day with positive affirmations, believing in your ability to be and achieve what you utter.
Treat yourself as you would a friend, get more active physically, and practice forgiveness. Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you and always stay positive.
You can improve your life if you propose to make the necessary changes.
“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.” — Marcus Aurelius