10 Secret Ways to Win Friends and Influencers

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According to Honore de Balzac, “Solitude is fine but you need someone to tell that solitude is fine.”

It is the strong social ties among the people which actually make them happy. We need to be an active part of the society because it is the people around us who help in keeping our sanity intact. The idea of having bonds, friendships, and contacts is necessary in the modern world not only to have a strong social circle but also to succeed in your career and financially. Here are 10 ways which can help you win friends and influencers and help you move in society with confidence:

1. Maintain Your Appearance

Your clothes say a lot about you and your personality projecting a definite image to the people around you. If you want people to have happiness, confidence, and stability from you then you need to wear such clothes which radiate these traits. Generally, this means that your clothes should be clean, crisp, ironed, color-coordinated which will reveal that you like maintaining yourself and are a responsible person.

2. Keep Yourself and Your Possessions Clean

No one likes to be around a person who doesn’t smell nice or has dirt on himself. Maintaining your hygiene is essential if you want people to like you. Taking a shower on a daily basis, brushing your teeth twice, combing your hair, applying a deodorant or a perfume are some of the many things which you must be mindful of. Not only yourself but all your belongings should also be clean especially your house and your vehicle as that will make you feel good about yourself.

3. Stay Active

“Physical activity is an excellent stress-buster and provides other health benefits as well. It also can improve your mood and self-image,” says Jon Wickham. An unhealthy person promotes an aura of unhealthiness around him, therefore, exercising or indulging yourself in any physical activity is essential for maintaining a positive attitude. You’ll feel good with positive energy and morale which will radiate to your friends and influencers around you as well.

4. Become a Great Listener

People are always craving for an ear that can listen to them and understand them. They don’t necessarily want a solution for their problems but someone who can just assure them that everything is going to be fine. Be that person if you want more people to call you their friend.

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5. Always Have Something Good to Say

The problem with today’s world is that people have a lot of bad things to say about each other, about the society, and anything that crosses their minds or their lives. Positivity can be found in the bleakest situations if someone knows how to view the situation differently. It is more about changing how your brain works and how you move in the society. As described by Charles Duhigg in his book ‘The Power of Habit’ that the way people do small things can actually have a great impact on the development of the society in a positive manner.

6. Boast a Positive Body Language

This is by far the strongest mean of communication between two people as it is hard to fake. By maintaining a positive body language, you’ll be surprised how likable you become among friends and influencers. Although it is complex because it requires you to have the right posture and carrying a smile wherever you go but it is good for your own self as well as your environment.

7. Match Rhythms with Those around You

Everyone is different and if you can mold your personality according to the people you are surrounded by, it is very likely that you’ll be winning some great friends. You can easily infer from their body language and the way they talk the kind of character they have and what their likes and dislikes are. Find the common traits of yours and their nature and focus on them.

8. Show Up For People

The hit TV show Friends title track was ‘I’ll be there for you’ resonate with the public because the first rule of friendship is to be there for each other at the time of celebrations and even during a crisis. Keith Ferrazzi also says in his book ‘Never Eat Alone’ that genuine relationship building is based on generosity, helping friends, and actually reaching out to people. If you are there for another person when he needs someone to celebrate his happiness or is looking for a shoulder to cry on, you have definitely won yourself a friend for a lifetime.

9. Respect Personality and Cultural Differences

It is very important to give the other person the right kind of space and accept him the way he is. People want to be accepted by the society, it is their dire need. If you give the other person enough confidence that he is absolutely fine the way he is unless he is causing any harm to the society, you are actually lifting up his soul. He might be the influencer that you really need for your next promotion. Nathan Dewall who is a psychologist at the University of Kentucky says, “Acceptance – in romantic relationships, from friends, even from strangers – is absolutely fundamental to humans.”

10. Avoid Criticism, Complaining, and Condemning

In How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie has mentioned this as one of the fundamental techniques in handling people. The book on the whole is considered to be one of the best self-help books to have existed. There is a thing about human nature – it fails to admit its own faults and resents the people who criticize them. Give people sincere and honest appreciation because that is what they want and will make them like you as well. This is also the only effective way to bring the desired change.

At the end of the day, all the humans seek happiness and contentment in their lives. Having a large number of friends means that you are liked by most of the people around you which itself is enough to make a person feel good about him or herself. If you spread positivity in the society then it will eventually come back to you.